Jamie Dimon Said Bitcoin Was a "Pet Rock" and His "Last Statement" on Crypto. Then His Bank Bought $343 Million of It.

Speaking at Davos with the weary disdain of a man who had clearly won this argument, Dimon declared Bitcoin was nothing more than a "pet rock" useful only for "money laundering, fraud, tax avoidance, and sex trafficking." He swore this would be his final word on the matter. Bitcoin was trading at $42,500.

Fast forward to late 2025: JPMorgan now holds $343 million in BlackRock's Bitcoin ETF. The bank allows institutional clients to use Bitcoin as collateral. By December, JPMorgan announced it would let institutional clients trade crypto directly — spot and derivatives. Bitcoin had touched $126,000 at its peak.

Dimon's "last statement" aged about as well as you'd expect from someone who called the internet "a fad" energy. His bank was quietly building Bitcoin infrastructure while he publicly called it a pet rock. The cognitive dissonance is almost impressive — like a vegan who owns a cattle ranch.

To his credit, Dimon later softened to "I don't think we should smoke, but I defend your right to smoke." A graceful pivot from "this is criminal garbage" to "fine, give us your money." The bank's $343 million position speaks louder than any Davos soundbite.